Monday, January 31, 2005

swirlin weekend

the last few weeks have been busy, work schedule switched around at the last minute, lots of visitors & meeting new can become disorienting.
Crystal went on her way on wednesday after staying for awhile & it was really good to see her as always.
on friday I finally met amanda from lorna's laces, where crystal works. we'd heard a lot about each other but never met. she and stephanie, who also works there, were in beans & bagels for their friday morning breakfast get together. both of them were very cool & i've been invited to join in on their friday gathering.
friday evening, michelle came into town from MN and i went out for a few drinks with her & her friends bud & jen. a very good time, excellent conversation.
on saturday michelle came over & then jen met up with us & the 3 of us got dinner at andies mediterranean restaurant on montrose (near my home).
we then went down to the long room (bar)on irving & met bud there, had a round of drinks & then walked back to my place & hung out late.
my place seemed to become the gathering place for the weekend, which was very nice. It was great to have all of those wonderful women in my home.
sunday was brunch day. after i went in to work to do the money, i came home & krista, michelle's friend from MN that drove down with her, came over, then jen & bud as well, and we all ventured down to roscoe village & Victory's Banner for brunch. VB is run by followers of sri chinmoy, and is all vegetarian. very very yummy actually. loved their bottomless cup of chai. mmmm
the wait was long to get a table, so while waiting, we all went over to the village thrift & did a little clothes shopping.
managed to pick up some jeans & a nice shirt.
it was great to spend time with all of them 3 days in a row.
have a feeling i'll be hangin out with jen again. (she's the only one of them that's living in chicago, bud living in san fran). we seemed to have quite similar tastes. probably will have to have a night of pee wee's playhouse box set watching soon.

the ibook i got recently should be up & runnin tonite if the replacement keyboard shows up today. i can hardly wait for that! I'm excited! still gotta get a wireless card for it though...

some new art ideas are coming to mind, inspiration to paint big & move into the realm of figurative drawing being added into my work, inspirational people & their ideas taking visual form. will be interesting to see how it emerges.

think i need a few days of rest to recoup from the late hours & social activity (which unfortunately i'm not used to!) but all in all, things sure are more exciting so far this year! whoohoo!

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Ebay Auctions - records, cds, and more

I'm sellin stuff on ebay.
record & cd collection is being thinned out.
check it out maybe there's something you'd like!
help me flesh out my music setup & obtain tools to help me write my books(s)!
all proceeds going to a very good cause! really!

Tuesday, January 18, 2005


well, i have not really felt the urge to post lately. it's been a long way from the front of my mind. maybe it's because of winter. i get pretty much hermit like.
Nothing monumental happening.
I've decided to finally start selling some of my record collection on ebay.
so far things are going alright with that. proceeds will be saved to buy a used laptop.
maybe then i will start writing more. the thought of sitting in a cafe eatin a sandwich & drinkin some hot bev. while typing away like a madman sounds very appealing to me right now.
I had an interesting thing happen the other day. I was getting off of the el train & bumped into this guy...well...people are supposed to "stand clear of the doors" as the announcement says: let people off first. anyway, this guy was right up against the door but off to the side, the side closest to the stairs down from the platform. I guess he expected everyone to walk around him on their way out so that he could make sure that he could get in first to get a seat. meanwhile, there was a whole family patiently waiting a few steps back & out of the way. there wasn't really enough room to get around this guy, so i simply walked where i should have been free to walk, to exit the train & be on my way. well, this guy's shoulder happend to be in the way. because of his anxiety to get on the train, i figured he'd slide in there right as i left, but he didn't, he continued to stand there & the path of my shoulder proved to be unmoving. that is, my shoulder completely puched his out of the way. maybe i was a little rude, but he left me no room to get around him.
as i passed him, he turned and lunged a few steps towards me with this crazed violent look in his eyes. guess i should describe him: he looked mid to late thirties, shoulder length hair -looked like a studio musician & i'll bet he was headin up to Rogers Park. seemed like the kinda guy that would live there. anyway...
...he lunges at me, and i take a few steps back towards him & he yells at me "Do you always push people when you get off the train?" I can't even begin to describe the violence i saw behind this animal's eyes. he was in no way aware, he was only animal anger, as if what happened was some huge thing, some important life happening. I did not say much, simply that i was attempting to exit the train in the proper manner. I remained absolutely calm, centered. his anger & violence bounced right off of me.
this is a big thing. i am usually shaken for quite awhile by such a transaction. this is the first time that i was nearly completely unmoved.i felt no need to call him on his own selfishness. I may have walked into him a little bit more than i should have to make a point, to tell the truth, i'm not really sure. maybe for the first time in my life i was an asshole & didn't care. i'm not sure, but what i do not is that he was not a frikkin victim. he was acting out of selfishness himself. but whatever.
it was a very huge thing for me to be unaffected, to be in complete control of my response, which was the exact opposite of how that man was behaving. he was nothing but reaction.
anyway, i just wish that people would learn some frikkin manners.
I'm the guy that waits to be the last one to enter the train. I'm not the pushy one.
strange how i don't even rememeber feeling my body hit his.
beyond that, not much happening.
lots of visitors this month. crystal just got into town lasst night & the last weekend of the month my friend michelle will be in town.
been getting together for games & movies with the foys which is always a good time.
cooked some indian food for margaret & her kids this last weekend too.
feels good to be cooking again.
well, that's it for now...hopefully I'll be posting more again.

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

2004 recap

Well...another one gone by.
I've now moved from my year of inner preparation into my year of outward action.
at least that's what is supposed to be happening according to my mind.
I do have to admit that 2005 has been a little more than interesting already.
many little stories about the holidays to tell, but I'm not feeling like writing about that right now. I'm feelin the need for a little recap of the past year.
here are some of the events & things that most influenced or affected me over the last year (with no particular order of importance):
- the peak of my journey with patricia.
this was one of the biggest events of the year for sure. After spending many months away from each other, we started to see each other again & the whole thing culminated in her expressing her true feelings for me (and I for her) & then running away from it. Well, that's putting it EXTREMELY simply, but that's the gist of it. The end of an almost three year long learning experience that was the most intense & enlightening experience of my lifetime. I owe more to that girl than to anyone. Through my interactions with her, I became aware of myself in a way that I'd only had glimpses & hopes of.
Thank you sweet P for believing in me & expressing such wonderful sentiments. Know that they flow both ways, even if we are never to meet again.
- discovering Osho /Bhagwan Shree Rhajneesh.
The self titled "spiritually incorrect mystic" . I've been reading transcripts of his discourses for months now. A complex occurrence. A trickster, a zen master, a seemingly arrogant guru that makes more sense than you'd think he would. EVERY aspect of this mans life was a technique created to challenge & catalyze change. He did not care how others perceived him. I found it interesting to discover this man, as we think in many similar ways, although he is a bit more trusting of the global structure than I am. Thank you Osho for presenting me with techniques to aid in my stepping forward into experiential reality. The step from the idealized into the actualized is a great one, and your words have proven a wise tonic.
-my new interest in broken beat/newgroove/nusoul etc.
I finally found that place where the majority of my musical passions converge. Soul, groove, tweaked beats, hope, love. A big thank ya to all of the headz out there making such wonderful music.
- finally succumbing to the world of console gaming.
Yep, the ps2 came into my life this last year & the Ratchet & Clank series of games became an obsession. I like the fact that it has me interacting with that screen instead of just watching it! An extra special thanks to Insomniac Games for creating such a great game & thanks to Derek for loaning me his ps2 which started the obsession.
- once again having a large garden.
I wish I would have tended to it like I should have, but even so, there were quite a lot of goodies! A great big thank you to Margaret my wonderful friend & landlady (and who I'm constantly crushin on) who allowed me to use a good chunk of the back yard. This year I'm going to take care of the whole thing for ya!
- meetin cool new people. like the foys & friends.
and interesting people from the net (I still think it's so interesting to connect with strangers from around the world in such a random manner) thanks to the world for providing chance encounters!
- my deepening friendship with crystal.
This girl has become family to me. Always there to listen, no matter how much I ramble on. She's taught me how to be comfortable with myself. I love her so much! Thank you for being like a sis!
- spending almost all of last January documenting "chemtrails".
I took over ten thousand photos over the course of that month. I still have yet to post them on my site. I need to go thru & organize, edit and make photo albums of them all. When posted , it will probably be one of the most comprehensive "time-lapse" style documentation websites of this phenomenon that is occurring in our skies. Did I reach a conclusion about what it is? No, but I definitely learned that air traffic is having a MASSIVE effect on our atmosphere & cloud cover. Whether or not they are spraying is not the point. This needs to be studied objectively. PERIOD.
NO THANKS to our government and the mainstream media, especially the weather bureaus for not even blinking an eye at the fact that air traffic is causing completely overcast skies. Maybe they think that if they ignore it it won't have any effect.
- starting to really keep up with this blog!
Thanks to kitten for the inspiration in that regard! I can't believe y'all read my crazy thoughts!
I'm sure that I'll come up with more influential things from the last year, but that's it for now.
I hope every one of you has an inspired new year!