Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Random connections

Yesterday afternoon, I decided to walk home from work; to brave the cold.
it was a good walk. A little more taxing than normal, but really really good.

an interesting thing occurred on that walk. A few things actually.
I guess I should back up a bit though...

I finally felt relaxed. relaxed into my work even.
it was good. Much needed.
the new excitement that has entered my life has been keeping me more often in a state of excitement than not.
well, for a little while that afternoon, I managed to be in the now.
the most natural sensation, and all to rare for most of us.

so, back to the walk...

being the holiday season, there are a LOT of people out on Michigan Ave.
well, I took a route up said Ave. As I had decided to walk home up the lakefront.
I had some Utah Philips & Ani DiFranco goin in the headphones & was feeling pretty blissful, even while navigating through the throngs of holiday shoppers who are not used to being pedestrians & tend to not have a clue about the dynamics of traveling by foot within a public setting (I blame the automobile for this one).
a HUGE thank you to j-dog for the Utah/Ani tracks.
they went unbelievably well with the crisp sunny winter day & the thin sheets of ice that stretched out a bit into the lake.
I love watching the drift of the plates & the "rivers" of water that exist between them, thinning & swelling as the ice glides back & forth.

back to the interesting thing that happened...
it was a few blocks before I enter the lakefront, just south of the watertower.
I was walking up the east side of the street and approaching an intersection.
so many people, in both directions, and my natural pace was already rising & I was making my way around people, waiting for the oncoming traffic to clear.
as I was starting to pass & move around everyone, I felt someone from the oncoming group of people grasp my forearm.
it was a quick firm squeeze, the kind that only someone who feels connected to you would give. An nonintrusive hello raised to a level of the need to physically connect, to cross that boundary.
it felt comforting.
I turned to see who it was but nothing registered. I could see no one looking back at me, no one who wanted me to see that it was them.
but then maybe I was not looking hard enough.
I was so lost in the actual experience of the feeling that was created by the action itself that I did not even really feel the need to put a face to it.
just as wonderful to leave it in it's pure form.
but I do wonder who it was.
heck, it could have simply been someone who wanted to know what my jacket felt like, or simply a random act of connection.
no telling really.
but it was interesting nonetheless.

once I got to the lakefront, it washed away though as other things were on my mind.
other people...another person...yeah, you know...
I smiled the whole walk home.
thinking about how much I just want to put my arms around her...

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