Monday, March 27, 2006

Keys update (long post)

Since there is not internet at the KW pad as I am writing this, it’s ended up being a small compilation of a couple of days posting, which I have been composing in word, so, I’ll break it up by date…

From March 23rd, 2006:

so...sittin here at in internet cafĂ© in key west as my friends’ internet is down at home (broken modem -doh!).
sweatin a little at 7:30 in the am.
gotta love it.
so fare the trip has been amazing.
the flight from Chicago was cake.
traffic around Miami sucked as i was driving out, but the drive thru the keys as amazing.
i have not had a good two lane highway drive like that in a long time & the fact that it was going out the keys made it that much more amazing.
windows down, warm air blowin in, the sun settin ahead of me....gotta love it.
arrived in KW around 7:30 in the evening and just kicked back on the back porch with mitch & casey shootin the shit.

cool thing's a camping trip too!
rockin the backyard tent, yo.

on wednesday I got to go out to a super exclusive small island called "Little Palms" if i remember right.
Mitch had to go put a bid in on a painting job out there.
so, we took a nice half hour ride in teh jeep to another key from which we were ferried via a small boat out to that island.
tons of herons & pelicans there and even a key deer. nothing like being right in the middle of the wild shit right away.
i guess this little island is so exclusive that they have a “ten second rule” - that is, the help/staff cannot look at the guests for more than ten seconds unless the guests have taken the initiative to interact. Crazy.
I guess the guests are mostly there on the weekends though cus I did not see any while I was there.
Man, if I could stay a few more weeks, I’d be helping mitch with that paint job, takin that boat ride out there 5 days a week & workin in the sun.
So, anyone wanna work my job, take care of noona, and show Nichelle around Chicago next week when she is stayin at my place in Chi-town?
cus I’d be staying for that work if I could!

It’s crazy how technology has changed things.
Who woulda thought that I’d be finishing up one of my songs on my laptop in a tent in the backyard in the middle of the night in key west?
Maybe it is time to make a “key west album”?
I brought my Korg ES1 and the Trigger Finger (which I just sold to Mitch last night to get him goin on the MIDI con troller tip).
Wishin I would have brought the x-station, but oh, well….

It’s funny how the boys keep askin what I want to do while I am here. My response seems to always be “relax”.
I’m not one of those vacationers that has everything lined up – gotta do this, then this…then this…
One thing that I know has to happen is some kayaking with mitch.
Beyond that, ‘bout all I am worried about is makin sure I get to the CO-OP event in Miami on Friday.
Looks like that may be a sweet jeep ride back & forth up the keys too…unless mitch is wanting to bus it. Hmmmm
More later ….

March 26th:
Wow…SO much to write.
The trip to Miami was quite an adventure!
Ended up going solo & finding a travel companion named Kat on the bus ride to Miami.
But let me backtrack a little first.
It’s been great stayin out in the backyard. We grilled up some salmon & asparagus on the grill the other night for dinner…yum.
Just hangin out, great conversation, listenin to music…etc.

So, back to the trip…
The busride ‘tween the keys & Miami is so easy & relaxed. Hardly notice that it is a 4 hour ride.
There’s a stop at about the midpoint in Islamarada at a BK, but I was turned onto a great alternative by Kat which is a small Mediterranean take out place. A little pricey but HUGE portions. I could only eat half of my sandwiches from there, falafel the first time, teriyaki chicken with pineapple & swiss on the way back. I’l be goin in again on my way home on Tuesday.
A Virgo from San Fran & remindin me a bit of the wilder younger stories I’d heard from Stacie & there were a lot of similarities there.
We talked pretty much the whole bus trip. She was headin to the WMC as well, except she had full luggage & no hotel room to go to. This became an issue when we got in to Miami as the downtown bus station was pretty much n ld shack.
We ended up renting a car (I did) so we could get around & to the Co-op event which she decided to go to with me.
We were cruising around in a P/T Cruiser. It was a decent ride.
I’ll tell ya though, Miami is FUCKED when it comes to street names. All numbers so there is for example a 40th ave. 40th st. NW and SE and N and it is confusing as all hell, so we torally ended up headin through the firkin ghetto for awhile & finally ended up finding the District (the club where the Co-Op event was).
We got there at around 7:30- 8:00 and the place was gorgeous. What a nice club.
You enter into an open courtyard with a fountain in the center & Japanese style benches around all of the corners. The main stage was set up at one end of the courtyard & the other end led into the “red room” which was the dance/dj lounge.
The back of the club had the main bar, restrooms and a dining area that converted into the lounge area once the kitchen closed.
Beautiful place.
So, when we got there kat went into the bathroom and cleaned up & got dressed for the evening while I kicked back & had a bear in the courtyard & started lookin at a menu.
The Double J attack from Detroit was setting up their gear on the stage & when done Jeremy saw me & recognized me enough to come ask what my name was & talk a bit.
Kat returned, we got some food and really frikkin good strong coffee & just kicked back & shared stories.
She’s been on the road for 2 months. A sculptor, costume designer, photographer.
She was interesting but I could sense a tweakiness I was not necessarily wanting to deal with too, and I was finding myself responsible for her luggage & her as the care was rented in my name (she gave me her part of the $ in advance so don’t think I wasn’t bein smart.)
But we were havin a good time. Met a bunch of women from the neighborhood that came in, unfortunately the only names I remember are the 2 Carmens, one of which , although a lesbian, was totally enamored with me & I with her too – I gave her my contact info & hope she gets in contact! It was a very touchy feely on the more playful innocent side kinda thing happening & it was oh so damn nice.
Her energy calmed me & made me feel great.
And she was totally lookin out for me too.
Even would have let me (actually both Kat & I) stay at her place that night if it were not for a breakup/divorce that she was going through with her partner.
So damn nice.
I hope to see her again sometime.
We were so into each other that I even found myself at one point jokin with her that she was makin me wish I was a woman to which I go the response, “baby, if you were a woman I’d be marrying you”
Damn. lol
I did not realize til after that night that I had been completely surrounded by women most of the evening.
Also talked to John Arnold, who I have to say is an unbelievably cool guy. I pretty much felt like he was welcoming me into the music community.
Passed out cdr’s to quite a few people & had some wonderful conversations.
the music was great. J&J’s set was of the hook as always & it was funy to see so many jaws dropping as people watched then rock out in their freestyle fashion.
Mark de Clive Lowe’s set was equally as impressive and also freestyle and included a percussionist & BembĂ© Segue on vocals as well as this chick from Hoboken who I’d talked to earlier (unfortunately cannot remember her name – was very cool) rockin the flute (and yes I just said rockin the flute).
It got really chilly for short sleeves and by the end of the evening – somewhere around 5am, I was pretty damn chilled to the bone.
Said goodbye to all of the new peeps & Kat & I drove out to the airport area to try to find her a room as I wanted to go ahead & turn in the car & head back to KW.
We found a holiday in out there & she went in & came out about 45 minutes later only to say that there were no rooms anywhere in town (which did not surprise me one bit.) so we pulled into the parking lot & kicked back in the car to rest for awhile.
She went in to use the restroom at some time around 7am and came back to say that the guy working was going to give us one of the rooms that people had just checked out of for the morning.
I had rested enough that I was just wanting to go turn the car in & get on the bus back to KW. She was upset that I did not want to come in.
But she managed to chill out & said she did not want to get into a fight with me on my birthday. So I dropped her & her stuff & took off.
Oh..almost forgot…the whole time we were parked I could see the enterprise place right across the street.
So, within 15 minutes I was on the shuttle to the airport to where I could pick up the bus.
Of course, I had missed the 6:45 by almost an hour, so I had to wait until the 12:45, so that was a lot of chillin out time at the airport on no sleep except for the half sleep in the car.
The bus trip back was relaxing & talked to various happy birthday callers both friend & family.
Walked back to the pad from the KW airport bus dropoff & then hung out with casey & a couple of M&C’s friends Nigel & Chris.
Slept like a log last night & have been helping prepare for the birthday cookout for mitch this afternoon.

There are more details to all of the kat story, and no, no hookup there, just partners in crime for an evening…
But I’ll leave those details for the personal conversations with all of my friends so I can give all of the color to the thing.
I do not think I am going to be ready to go home on Tuesday…

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

off i go

just a few hours til my first flight in over ten years.
oh, how i look forward to airport security!
imagine safe travels.
key west, here i come!
pics, etc. will be posted.

Friday, March 17, 2006

awwww man....

so now i discover this after already plannin my schedule..there is no way i'm gonna find a room for the 24th in miami...
so i guess i gotta miss this one:

Venue: Sobe Live
Address: 1203 Washington Ave. Miami Beach 33139
Time: 11:00 pm - 5:00 am
Admission:$15 B4 Midnight $20 after
WMC Badge Policy: Reduced
Venue Type: Club
Details:West London massive BUGZ IN THE ATTIC goes head to head with JAZZANOVA - the Berlin-based DJ production dons of all things funky and soulful. + very special guests and live performances! Expect a sophisticated mix of hellified ghetto funk, swinging soul-jazz, deep-house killers, and broken-beat proper!

Thursday, March 16, 2006

not only do i gotzta, i AM!

yep...bought my tick to miami tonite & am goin to take the greyhound 'tween there & key west.
tuesday to tuesday, with a trip back to miami for the co-op event on friday/saturday.
worth the extra 8 hours on the frikkin bus! (i'll be sleepin those last 4 back to KW)
i can hardly wait.
kick back in the sun, the ocean...
i have needed this for sooooo long.
happy birthday to me mooterfookers!
wonder if i am going to have a job to come back to...
guess we will see...
if not, what a way to start fresh.

i'm sure maestro mitch & myself will have some deep recording sessions.
gotta figure out what gear to take to pack it...
so much to do before then.
better get some rest first...laterz.....

gotzta go!

oh i want to go to this event SO bad!
wish me luck!
yo mitch! i'm comin to key west so lookout!

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

how my garden grows

yeah i bet you are thinking that this is going to be a post about me planting my garden!
well, guess again!
i write of my spiritual, my existential garden.
it keeps becoming more & more beautiful as i take the time to experience each flower, each blossom.
as it sprouts, as it grows, as it buds & blooms, as it seeds & withers into the past.
such a beautiful thing.
so natural & flowing when one does not fight it.
when one does not feel the need to grasp too tightly.
to have a gentle touch, a touch of love, of understanding, of reverence.
something which is very lacking in these times where most things & relationships become desacralized and seems as passing & meaningless.
it simply amazes me how when i remain less attached to outcome i am more & more capable of experiencing the deep richness of my experiences.
The true depth of connection with those close to me becomes so obvious.
i can see how much of a blessing it is.

i have to admit though that in a way my detachment is an easy way to stay centered in this crazy ass time we are in.
most around me are in turmoil, and even a lot of my own experiences over the past few months have been rather life changing & revealing in nature.
they are the kinds of experiences that in the past would have knocked me off of my feet & left me depressed & wondering what the hell i am doing & where i am going.
instead i find myself laughing.
the absurdity of it all: time, distance, expectations, illusions, unneeded guilt,fear of rejection, of judgment...
for the first time in years, i spent the winter in action instead of hibernation.
it makes me doubly excited to see what spring has to bring.

i've got a list of projects to work on...both work & play and the year is becoming more & more fruitful with each passing day.

the change is finally happening.
the sleeper is awakening.
there's change on the wind...can you feel it?
it's coming & it is going to change everything.
i can only hope that more & more are doing the inner work needed in order to withstand it.
whether or not the change is drastic should not matter. it is the change inside that counts most as it will then reverberate outwards.
we must be the change we want to see in the world.
at our very core.
otherwise, aren't we just faking it?

Sunday, March 12, 2006

peaceful & tired

had quite a weekend.
my friend Michelle was in from MN which was really awesome as i had not seen her in quite some time.
We had dinner with friends,
lots of great conversation,
chai that left us saying "why?"
dancin till the wee hours,
and an incredible brunch.
i was sad to see her go home today, but it just gives me another reason for a roadtrip!

so tired tonite after all of the activities, but it was so damn worth it.
leaving me with many things on my mind.
it's always good to come away from time with friends inspired & renewed.
i just need a good night's sleep after all of that dancing last night.

i've also been working on final versions of some of my newer songs. coming along slowly but extremely well. always good to surprise one's self.
time for rest...
more tomorrow?...

Thursday, March 09, 2006

looking backwards is backwards

if evolution is a truth, and for this point i will accept that it is,
then why would we ever look backwards for answers? for guidance?
If evolution is the truth then every generation is more capable, brighter, and more embedded within a symbiotic relationship with the world around them.
There should be no looking backwrds, but only a feedback loop with the NOW, the present, as that is the ONLY world in which we actually exist, in which we pretend at objectivity (and the term objectivity should be suspect as reality is an ongoing everchanging process, which means that verbs - actions are the standard, not nouns or objects.the static state = death. objects are just temporary technologies for interaction).
They, by definition, should be naturally more capable of existing in a balanced manner with reality as a matter of course, without any effort whatsoever.
The more effort, the more "problem solving" which must occur, the more human control of environment that must occur, the less we are in communion with the world around us.
We must ask ourselves what exactly is at the root of this need to control? what part of our beings creates this situation?
Which reality templates have been created that support it & promote it?
If it is not the case that we are increasingly capable of living in a natural flowing balance with our surroundings, could one not argue that we are devolving?
that we are becoming less & less capable of using our present resources in a balanced way?
that we are less & less in a cocreative dialogue with the world around us, with ourselves?

and remember this...
the only being that can be a true scientist is an enlightened being, one who has passed into the realm of no mind.
Because if there is any mind, any idea or preconceived notion about things, there cannot be true objectivity because there is already a belief present.
and this belief, no matter how infinitismal in nature, determines the state in which reality will manifest to the observer.
the belief, the lens,the perception determines the reality.

the joy is in finding

here is a link to a 10 minute video of osho speaking on the journey, on how it is the finding rather than the having which enriches our lives.

it is a big file, so be patient, and if you do not have broadband, best to not even try as you will be downloading for a very long time!

also, here is a quote from "Journey Toward the Heart - Discources on the Sufi Way" which i just finished this is an old sufi story.

"Shibli was asked: 'Who guided you in the Path?'

Shibli said: 'A dog. One day I saw him, almost dead with thirst, standing by the water's edge.
Every time he looked at his reflection in the water he was frightened and withdrew, because he thought his reflection was another dog.
'Finally, such was his necessity, he cast away fear and leapt into the water; at which the reflection disappeared.
'The dog found that the obstacle, which was himself, the barrier between him and what he sought, melted away.
' In this same way, my own obstacle vanished when I knew that it was what I took to be my own self.
And my Way was first shown to me by the behaviour of - a dog'"

Monday, March 06, 2006

old moldy music

Just "rediscovered" my first recordings i did in the "electronic" realm.
I had just come out of some heavy listenin to bands like the flaming lips, mercury rev, spiritualized, swervedriver...
just discovered ambient, electronic dub, and all of the other stuff happenin in the early & mid-nineties.

I was as influenced by krautrock (especially Faust's album "So Far") and early tangerine dream / eno / fripp, etc. as by current electonica of the time.
The Future Sound of London's ISDN album came out & i just felt like i had to do something like that - the flowing, creating a world with music vibe. so, with only a tascam 424 cassette 4 track, a guitar, a whole lotta effects pedals, a borrowed old casio keyboard (the cheap ones), some sound effects cd's,and a borrowed bass, i managed to create something that while lo-fi due to the technology available to me, was out of control in the boundaries department.

i basically used a process of "improvised overdubbing" where i would do a live take of each track without going thru the song multiple times.
I also surrendered to the aesthetic of the technologies, made friends with the noise, so to speak. it was as much about seeing how the speakers reacted to what i was doing as anything else. sound experiments, sonic sculpture...
so yes, there are many mistakes in there, but they are all human, and so is the music.
it was all mixed "dubstyle" with lots of echoes and panning in the mix process.

here is a link to side one of the original cassette tape.
it is a little over 50 minutes long. 57M at 128kbps.

if you make it thru the thing i am proud of you! you deserve an award!
remember....1995....CASSETTE 4-Track. My Broke ass. sampler free.

Thursday, March 02, 2006

bumbled & humbled

We all need a good humbling, a good smack in the face now & then.
I got a good one tonite. It was awesome.
j-dog! Way to go.
It was one heck of a talk about evolution, science, philosophy amongst other things.
Always good when I manage to catch her while she’s on the road.
Rare time when we can talk for a long period & not have any real distractions except for the occasional dropped signal.

It is good to have someone that I know will really REALLY challenge me.
The funniest part about the humbling I had tonight was that I was feelin pretty big shot today.
Total aries energy goin on.
I am amazed at how every time I ingest/digest these conversations that we have,
I have such profound insights, such effective realizations.
i bow before you j-dog! Haha.
Hit me with that stick when you know I need it!

this is going to be quite an interesting journey…

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

It is you, not the truth, which wears the veil

The mirror...
I've been realizing more & more recently that I cannot allow myself to believe how others perceive me. I must remember that I am a mirror, that what they see is as much or more of a reflection of their inner world than it is of my reality or potentiality.
it is all too easy to get caught up in the drama, the illusion of these limits that we impose on each other.
we hold on to our fear, of the idea of potential disaster & take all precautions, not realizing that by doing so that we may very well be creating the situation which we are not wanting to experience.
we are solidifying a potentiality, cocreating with the "quantum field" or "mind of god" or whatever one wishes to call it - nature -life - and determining the state of our own future as well as the pattern that we are imprinting onto the greater cosmic hologram.
this means that whatever we are holding inside of us, the programming, the illusions, the perceptions, are being projected, exist in all places at all times to varying degrees of definition (meaning resolution -clarity -depth).

everything we believe creates the world, determines the lens through which we focus our perception, which in turn determines how our bodies manifest & how we interact with the world around us and create our realities.
so it is very important to bring awareness to our choices when it come to our reality templates, our beliefs, our religions, our dogmas, our attitudes.
these things are the very devices, technologies which shape reality, which manifest our world, be it heaven or hell or somewhere inbetween.
as I read this morning... the truth does not wear the veil, it is all of us individually which wear it, otherwise if it was truth and not us that wears the veil, once it is removed everyone would be instantly enlightened as the truth would not be hidden from anyone.
instead, we each have to remove our own veils and be ready & willing to face the truth with clear unmediated eyes.
it's always there for everyone to see, experience. It is simply a matter of recognizing the presence of the veil & then choosing to remove it.
everyone has their own process, their own style, their own way of removing it. Some slowly, some instantly.
there is no right or wrong in this.
it simply is.
and the more we focus on being supportive rather than judgmental, the more relaxed and natural is the path for all of us.
the idea of enemy is illusion.
do not be fooled. It is shallow.
there are only the awakened & those who walk in their sleep.
focus on removing the ability for destructive action on large scale, not on destroying people who are learning the hard way. The problem is in the tools & technologies that are at the disposal of these lost zombies.
they have a right to be wrong, to make mistakes, to learn the hard way. We must simply take away the ability for them to harm so many in the process.
we must be compassionate.
instead of saying negatives such as "NO WAR" we should be focusing on positives like "YES PEACE".
be visionary.
you are needed.
now more than ever.